During the mundane task of grocery shopping last week, I was struck by an tenacious old woman…not literally beaten, but taken aback by her actions. Yes she was old (I’m not being derogatory), I would say definitely in the 80′s range somewhere.
Anyway, as I was walking up the isle I could see she was scanning the shelves looking for something, as I got closer she apparently had located the item she was looking for….it seemed on the top shelf. Without pause or looking for someone to help, she was off…..she had her foot on the bottom shelf ready to climb up and grab the prize.
I did a double take and thought…jeez shes not is she?….hell yes she was!
I rushed over to help, and gently asked if I could get something for her, after all I didn’t want to startle her and have her toppling off the shelf.
“Oh that would be lovely” she said.
She stepped down from the shelf and pointed to her choice…Crackers (Gluten Free BBQ flavour to be exact). Even I had difficultly reaching them.
As I passed the box she asked if I could get her another one…she obviously wasn’t looking to add climbing to her regular weekly activities. I handed the second boxdown, for which she thanked me and went off on her merry way.
So why did I feel the need to tell you this story, after all its probably something that you have witnessed for yourself…..Frankly because I was so damned impressed.
She wanted those crackers and she just made the decision that she needed to climb on the shelves to get them. She didn’t stand there waiting for someone to come and help, she wasn’t prepared to forgo what she wanted just because there was a little difficulty in getting hold of it, she certainly wasn’t concerned about how her age or physicality entered into it.
Its easy to fall back into the role of victim and feel helpless (perhaps even more so as you get to that kind of age), but this woman is someone to aspire to, purely for her attitude of mind. After all it was a very brief encounter and I know nothing about her or her life, but I’ll tell you this… it has made a lasting impression on me and I certainly hope that I remain as tenacious as her when I’m that age.
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There are always tenacious, vibrant and determined people in the world, what I find more inspiring, is that even though she was happy to do it herself, she openly accepted the help without feeling useless, to the point she asked for more. So good on her and you x
I wish there were more people like her in the world…inspiration lies where you least expect to find it.
Thanks for commenting Tam
You choose to be independent or not. Some people actually do like to depend on others. I don’t understand that myself to be frank but, my Dad has become one of those people. He makes out he’s an idiot (which he has never been) and he’s almost childlike in his behaviour but you look at my Mum and there’s an entirely different kettle of fish. Fiercely independent (to the point of ridiculous) and never wanting to acknowledge that she might need help.
That in itself has been a big learning curve for me. There has to be some form of balance. You’ve gotta give it a red hot crack (whatever it is you’re trying to achieve) but, if for some reason, you can’t do it, then yep, ask for or accept help when it’s offered. There’s no shame in that.
I’ve witnessed similar scenarios in supermarkets and other places and the thing is, just offer to help. The offer might be accepted or refused but whatever, you’ve done your part in that life moment. I’ve also taken big advantage of people who might be there at the time and asked them to reach something for me so I don’t have to climb the shelves *L* Most people are happy to oblige.
That’s why we’re here….to learn, to help, to encourage, to offer and accept.
Hey Claire
I agree there are those that like to play the invalid or the victim even when in fact they’re not, and those that just want to get on with life and not be dependant or have to rely on anyone. Both of which can create their own issues. Personally I love to see that independant spirit, especially in the elderly, it just makes me think YEAH!! how cool.